[Feba]

This was written by a young Feba. I cannot be held responsible for gouging out of eyes. I can be responsible for the fact that it is completely hilarious. Transcribed directly from the written word, without correction. There is only one accompanying drawing, to be uploaded at a later date.

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A Horse
By: (Young Feba)

The Ride of fReedom

Years ago many pe ople liked horseis.

But one night one horse got Kid-napped!

The next moning the mayor woke up to go to the barnand said "Help!, Help,! My Horse has been Kidnapped!!"

Then the baker said to the mill Keepper "The mayor's Horse Has been Kidnapped!!"

The millKeper told the paper boy, Who put it in the newspaper.

The whole city was looking for the horse.

Then The Rider-of-dark came.

Even the Rider-of-dark had done some bad things but the horse He was Riding was not the mayor's.

Then, Out of nowere, came a K-9. "Hey!", said someone, "if you give it something to sniffhe might find who ever didit!"

"Let's try it!!!" shouted everybody.

They got him.

His name was "Jose Bas" then the mayor rode his horse, and that was the "ride of freedom!"

A FlY Intothe SKy

The mayor rode him into the sKy as something magical happed!

The Horse got wings!

As he took-off he shind-in-the-sun.

good Night, sleep Tight

it's Night Now.

They both were in the hay. they both like to lay.

Run Away Horse!

When the horse ranaway it was BI G.

Everyone wanted to find the horse so they could win $350 prize.

One day the horse came back with a rope!

Rope?

"everyone to the horse." said a man.

On the rope was anote, it said..

Dear Mayor,
I found your horse and I want the money!
from,
Rider-of-Dark.

Rider-of-dark

Every-body was thinking the R-o-d took the horse and when he found out about the money he gave it back for the money

350!

$350 was at risk.

Didthe Rider-of-dark steel or not?

The R.O.D. did steal the horse!

He was Putin Jail.

Jail

In Jail You have to eat soup everyday.

And You stay ina box.

Portrait of MaGiC the apparently two legged horse

a Name

Once the horse was back every body came up with a name.

the best one was Magic, so that was his name.


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the BacKwords BooK
By: (Young Feba)

"zzzzzzz" said I.

Then I Got in my P J's.

"Yum said I, at dinner time.

"School is dull" said I "zzzzzz" said I.

-------

How To Write A Book
By: (younG FEba)

first Brainstorm.

Then,you take a pencil and paper.

When yore book is done, it's a good Job!
___
|T|he best work
|I|s the best
|P|.S. a book that
|S| for Kids shoud not be chapter books
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You are all welcome.

[Raydeus]

Oh boy.


Well I'm speechless, so that has to mean it's awesome.

This could be interpreted as a young kid's dream about the Dark Rider's legend (and his horse!) so maybe you already knew about the fight between Alexander and Odin in Aht Urgan.

Either that or you wanted a pegasus (read: pony) at the time.




PS > I'm still speechless but at least I can type.

Where's part two?

[Yellow Mage]

Originally Posted by Raydeus

a pegasus

Peeve: this has to be at least as bad as everything Young Feba threw on here combined.

THE PROPER TERM IS "WINGED HORSE." PEGASUS IS THE NAME OF ONE SUCH WINGED HORSE.

ALSO, THEY ARE GORGONS. NOT "MEDUSAS." MEDUSA WAS A GORGON.

/fantasy peeve

[Raydeus]

Just capitalize the P on pegasus. That should fix it.

[Lmnop]

So how long ago was this written? Last October?

[hexx]

I think he had a spazz attack and wrote it last night while on said spazz attack..............

[Feba]

Originally Posted by Lmnop

So how long ago was this written? Last October?

If by 'last october' you mean 'when you were around six years old', that sounds about right.

[Raydeus]

I still think the K-9's appearence was too forced.

[Feba]

honestly, there is so fucking much I love about this.

1- The baker told the mill keep, who in turn told the paperboy.
1a- There seems like a much easier solution to this. "I'M THE FUCKING MAYOR, SOME ASSHOLE STOLE MY HORSE."
1b- The paperboy put it in the paper somehow.

2- The RIDER OF DARKNESS shows up in the town uninvited, but that's totally cool because he's not riding the mayor's horse! This is called foreshadowing, my friends!

3- A K-9 (Because the old west had K-9 units amirite) shows up out of fucking nowhere, and people think to have it sniff crap and hope it's trained to track scents.

4- All you ever learn about the kidnapper is his name. That's it.

5- RANDOM FLYING HORSE

6- RANDOM SLEEPING CHAPTER

7- "it was BI G". Mostly because when I read this earlier, I assumed I meant literally big, as in size.

8- The horse comes back with a rope, and this is cause to rally everyone in town.

9- People are freaking the fuck out about this horse ransom demand while the horse is STANDING RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF THEM.

10- Chapter $350! is just plain superb. A Mystery in Four Sentences. "The problem at hand. Is this what happened? THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED! Resolution". None of that pesky 'trial' bullshit.

11- Chapter Jail is also wonderful. You eat soup. Everyday. And you stay in a box. It's just so Dickensian, so wonderfully bleak.

12- Random epilogue (in the original form, this is the only page that isn't numbered), where we find out that THE MAYOR NEVER NAMED HIS FUCKING FLYING HORSE.

It's just so hilarious in so many ways.

[Raydeus]

There's too much material to digest in a single day, but I assumed BI G was a reference to B1663R.

In fact the rope (and the conspiracy around it) support this theory.

[Yellow Mage]

Originally Posted by Raydeus

Just capitalize the P on pegasus. That should fix it.

You failed to realize where I found issue:

Originally Posted by Raydeus

a pegasus

[Raydeus]

And you failed to realize what I was talking about.

It's like when someone says:

"I want a Mizuki Nana."


But let's not focus on the little details, there's a lot of stuff going on here to waste time on that.

For instance how did the horse get those wings in the first place? They say Magic, but in what context are they using the term?

Also, if you look at it as a theater play you start noticing many details that could point out to lack of funds in the production. Or it could've been written that way on purpose to enhance the symbolism.

Like the rope scene, for example.

[Feba]

Oh, I forgot lucky number reason 13: the fact that half of the lines are spoken by random, unnamed people.

[DakAttack]

I did a little detective work.

I found the bastard that stole the horse!

He has a myface account!

Whether or not he is the R.O.D., that's up to forensics.