[Ziero]

Feeling lost in the maze of life? Let Moblin Maze Mongers build the labyrinth of your dreams!
We're here today in downtown Jeuno to bring you an exclusive interview with Goldagrik, the pioneering mind behind Moblin Maze Mongers!
He spoke with us about his company's vision and the made-to-order mazes that are sure to delight adventurers across the realm.

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- Er, why don't you start by telling our readers a little bit about yourself, uh...sir.

"What'cha starin' at, missy?
Never seen a Moblin dressed like me before?
No wonder, 'cause yer speakin' to none other than Goldagrik—visionary among Moblins and the brilliant business mind behind Maze Mongers, Inc., purveyor o' the most marvelous made-t'-order mazes!"



- So what exactly are these mazes you build?

"What are they!?
Only the most devious, diabolical labyrinths you've ever laid yer pretty eyes upon, lovin'ly crafted t'each customer's demanding specifications!"

- Designing a maze sounds terribly complicated...

Ohoho...fear not!
Every Maze Monger customer will be provided with a Maze Tabula, y'see here? Just use one o' these to make a scale model o' yer dream dungeon and our expert artisans will take care o' the rest!"

- That certainly sounds simple enough! So did you have any trouble clearing the Grand Duchy's notoriously strict "Building codes?

Building codes? Not sure I follow ye, missy.
Y'see, our mazes are built underground—under the ocean floor, no less.
We Moblins have been drillin' down there for ages without worryin' 'bout no building codes.
Our customers give us an order, we build 'em a maze, simple as that.
How they use it ain't none o' our concern."



- The construction time you advertise seems awfully short for such a massive architectural undertaking...

"Look, us Moblins have been diggin' and delvin' in Movalpolos since yer granddaddy's granddaddy was in diapers. If ye can't trust us, who can ye trust? Eh?
Precision architecture. Comprehensive maintenance. Safe and secure, with limitless possibilities! The perfect maze—of the adventurer, by the adventurer, and for the adventurer."

- But won't the expenses put a strain on adventurers' coinpurses?

"Thought ye'd never ask!
Fortunately, my lovely secretary Chatnachoq is here t'educate our potential customers about Moblin Maze Mongers' three guarantees."

"Yes sir, Mr. Goldagrik, sir...

1) Challenging mazes for the self-improvement-minded adventurer!
2) Delightful mazes that will attract scores of challengers (and admission fees for their owners)!
3) Profitable mazes with piles of treasure to be had!"



- Well, I guess these mazes will offer something for everyone!

"Ye got that right!
So what'dya say, adventurers?
Won't ye be the first t'order yer own private maze with Moblin Maze Mongers?
Act quickly, and we'll even throw in a special limited-time offer! Yes, that's right—
(lengthy sales pitch deleted –ed.)
Now there's a deal ye can't refuse! So what're ye waitin' for?"

- Well, uh, I guess that concludes our interview. Thanks for your time, Mr. Goldagrik!

Illustration: Mitsuhiro Arita

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This is just a taste of what's in store for adventurers when Moblin Maze Mongers opens for business for next month. Interested parties should make plans to visit the Chocobo Stables in Lower Jeuno for the grand opening!

(Interview by Vana'diel Tribune reporter Finleen)

FINAL FANTASY XI Official Web Site

[Durahansolo]

Why do I get the feeling there will be a tax on the admission fees lol.

[Ziero]

Because you're a pessimist

Infact it even said players can make money off this thing by charging others to go in! O.o

[Durahansolo]

Originally Posted by Ziero

Because you're a pessimist

Infact it even said players can make money off this thing by charging others to go in! O.o

Actually I was joking, but remember it is Jeuno, so if it does happen I won't be surprised. I think it might acutally be a cool idea but I'll have to see how it's setup.

[Balfree]

Originally Posted by Ziero

Because you're a pessimist

Infact it even said players can make money off this thing by charging others to go in! O.o

Yes, that bit was what interested me the most o.O!

Let's pray this is properly implemented without the usual lolIssues...

Yes I'm a bit pessimistic these days too.

[Kailea]

my god, they are acutely adding this o.0

I remember them talking about it.....but we all know how SE is, I figured it would not happen ;p

[Ziero]

Originally Posted by Durahansolo

Actually I was joking, but remember it is Jeuno, so if it does happen I won't be surprised. I think it might acutally be a cool idea but I'll have to see how it's setup.

And I was just teasing, and while it might not be taxed I can almost gaurentee that this thing will come with sizable gil requirements. You'll most likely have to pay for everything you add into it, meaning the best ones will be built by those with the most cash.

However, as said on another forum I visit, this has the potential to be as epic as ToAU endgame or as lolworthy as the Choco Circuit.

[Armando]

In before "I'm sure they'll find a way to fuck up somehow."

[Ellipses]

Originally Posted by Ziero

- But won't the expenses put a strain on adventurers' coinpurses?

"Thought ye'd never ask!
Fortunately, my lovely secretary Chatnachoq is here t'educate our potential customers about Moblin Maze Mongers' three guarantees."

"Yes sir, Mr. Goldagrik, sir...

1) Challenging mazes for the self-improvement-minded adventurer!
2) Delightful mazes that will attract scores of challengers (and admission fees for their owners)!
3) Profitable mazes with piles of treasure to be had!"

So, basically, "Yes."

I'll wildly speculate that you're going to need weird drops and crafted items with a whole lot of /random thrown in to get the little miniature thingamajigs you use to define what goes in your dungeon.

Although it's still cool, and I'm looking forward to seeing it in action.

[Durahansolo]

Originally Posted by Ziero

And I was just teasing, and while it might not be taxed I can almost gaurentee that this thing will come with sizable gil requirements. You'll most likely have to pay for everything you add into it, meaning the best ones will be built by those with the most cash.

However, as said on another forum I visit, this has the potential to be as epic as ToAU endgame or as lolworthy as the Choco Circuit.

Yeah I didn't think about that but we will probably have to pay for the things we add in. I wonder if you'll be able to buy mobs to put in there to fight on the way through, I'd just hate to be running through there solo and run into PW.

[Ziero]

Originally Posted by Durahansolo

Yeah I didn't think about that but we will probably have to pay for the items. I wonder if you'll be able to buy mobs to put in there to fight on the way through, I'd just hate to be running through there solo and run into PW.

....Pankemon!

Gotta catch em all D=

[Truece]

Oh shit! They're gonna require anyone who wants to build a dungeon to participate in Pankration!

Someone pinch me this HAS to be a nightmare!

/speculation

Also: looking forward to seeing this in action

[Cotners]

Originally Posted by Armando

I'm sure they'll find a way to fuck up somehow.

So pessimistic, gosh!

[Malacite]

There's got to be some kind of limit to this.

I imagine that each maze will be active for so many weeks and/or each player or account is limited to so many mazes.


But WOO HOO!!!! :O

Think they'll let us put most NMs (I doubt we can add mobs like Fafnir...) into our mazes?! ^_^ I wonder if there will be a dynamis-like restriction (can only enter once every 3 days)

[Aksannyi]

Originally Posted by Armando

In before "I'm sure they'll find a way to fuck up somehow."

Well I read the thread on BG before I read this one, so you weren't INB4 anything for me.

This sounds cool.